Health Science Reviews

By Blake Stuart

As the end of the year edges closer, I have found myself “reflecting” more and more upon my academic journey and I am surprised at how much my perspective has changed. Throughout undergrad, despite all the trials I went through and milestones I achieved, I never really felt like an adult. Technically, I was of age, living away from home and attending university like any other young adult, but deep down I still saw myself as just a student. More akin to a child navigating through a world of adults, than someone truly prepared to step into it. I sat through lectures, completed my assignments and passed my exams (with good marks, not that anybody asked) and yet there was always a lingering feeling that I was just playing a role, not quite feeling the competence and independence that seem to define adulthood.

Even after graduating with my bachelor’s degree, I still didn’t quite feel like a “proper” scientist. I hoped that my honours year would be the turning point, but the blend of coursework and lectures in the first semester still had me feeling like the same old student. It also didn’t help that every person I spoke to told me that, in the field of science and in industry especially, you are invisible until you reach your PhD. As such, a large part of me resigned myself to going through the motions for the next few years, studying science, but never really embracing it.

The turning point came, predictably, once the coursework component of honours ended. After writing exams and taking a (controversial) two week vacation, I returned refreshed. The lectures and exams that had defined my academic experience for so long were finally behind me. Now I was able to focus entirely on my thesis, my own, mostly independent, research, and for the first time I started to feel like an actual scientist. The realisation that – this was my work. The ideas, analysis and direction of the research all depended on me. I wasn’t just following someone else’s path; I was forging my own (with help from supervisors). I finally came to understand how people can happily dedicate their lives to research. There’s a deep sense of fulfilment in pushing the boundaries of what is known and contributing something new and relevant to the academic community.

Looking ahead, I am finally filled with excitement and anticipation. The future holds many possibilities, and whilst I still don’t really know what I’ll do or where I end up, I’m content to wait and see. At last, I truly feel like I belong in this exciting world of science.